Tuesday, July 31, 2012

What have you done today to make you feel proud

For some reason this particular picture on the left of this paragraph seemed appropriate. Remember the song by Heather Small titled "Proud".  Man, hearing that song just motivates me to be the best and do the very best I can.

When she sings the chorus "What have you done today to make you feel proud," she drives and hits a feeling deep within my spirit. I want to share that feeling with everyone.

What have you done today to feel proud my friends. Do you feel like you are covered in ill feelings or feel that something is weighing you down so much that you can't reach the pride that is in each and every one of you.

Whether you have gay pride, black pride, self-pride or just plain ole' "I am glad God put me here" pride, it all ties into the greatness that is in all gay people. I am here to tell you, never be ashamed of being proud of how the Creator of All made you. Being that I am a spiritual and not very religious, does not make me any less in tune with the my gay brothers and sisters. If there is one message I want  you all to know is that pride in yourself leads to pride in each other. All of this leads to the first steps of unity.

It took a while to understand what true pride is, from the very base definition of the word. Pride is the esteem you feel from just knowing that everyday is a day you can be what you want to be. You don't have to be what is predicted for you or what despair has done to you. The person that you are now is good enough for me and anyone else in  this world.

The only person that has to live with the person you are is you which means the pride that means anything in this world comes from you, starts with you and propelled by you. Have pride in yourself because believe me, you will not find it from anywhere else.

Sunday, July 29, 2012

Your life must be your own

You know, life is sometimes like a short man with a funny hat. When this odd looking fellow is right in front of you,  you don't know whether to laugh or have pity for the soul. You definitely don't want to make him your friend because at first glance you are not sure what he has to offer at the time.

Somewhere between the smirking and the caulking you come to your senses to realize that he is a person that can be hurt like any other. All the apprehensive awkwardness is something in your mind because the funny man that is in front of you has not said or done anything to throw your perception of him a curve ball.

Then all of a sudden without hint or preview of movement, that little man throws off his hat and you realize that you have been looking at yourself. All the emotions that you placed upon the head of a man that you believed to be separate really was just an image that manifested into real life because you had no other to transfer your emotions onto.

OK, so why talk of funny little men, hats, life and deep introspection? Because that funny little man could have been a brave solider, competent being, fierce warrior or anything that you wanted him to be if given the opportunity to look again. When we look into ourselves it is hard to excuse the pain that we feel. The amazing person and power within us all is overshadowed with doubt, rage, skepticism and pain. So, to cover it all up we envision someone that would either blend in or not to be noticed at all.

There are times where I feel I want to meld into average normalcy and no that is a not a slip of the fingers upon my keyboard. I used two words synonymous with each other to convey the intensity of wanting that wish to come true but now I realize something. It was not meant for me to be in some shadowy place where I am not noticed. I am more than I could ever possibly imagine and I want to keep growing.

This is something that all of you out there need to feel if you have never felt the value of admiration in the person that you are. You are more than just somebody that exists. This Earth and this universe would not be the way it is without you because the Creator of All placed you here. There is no "What if you weren't here."  You are here and nothing in the world can change that nothing. Because each of you are power personified you have the ability to be great and make no mistake, the life you have is your own. Make something beautiful out of it, because when your eyes close for the last time in this world, you never want to regret what you know you could have been.

Wednesday, July 25, 2012

A most important message I can hope to give

If ever I wanted to say something, this is the moment and most pivotal point to share what this feeling to the gay community. When I look at my life I am not proud of every moment. I am not the best writer in the world. I have not accomplished all that I have set out to do. I am sure there are many aspects of my life that people see that does not show me in the most favorable light. I am just a person that goes through struggle and trouble like anyone else but now I  understand that not everyone will be on your side no matter what side of the of the fence you are on. But, the one thing in my heart and in my spirit that is real has always been the wanting to help others, to help the gay community any way I can and above all to help people.

You see, the reason I am writing this now, is because I received certain comments about some of the articles I have written and there are others that see parts of my life in nothing put limited view. I did not realize how much it gets me down when you right about something you believe in with the purpose of supporting something greater than yourself just to have people's perception of you become a determining factor in your effectiveness to get your message across. I guess it is hard to preach the word of God to a congregation if you can't live by the principles you convey to your flock. 

Well, I am not a preacher, I am a gay man with problem and issues like anyone else. That means, I fail at being everything I want to be just like anyone else but not matter what my readers, fans and this world perceives about me, I will continue to fulfill all that which is within my spirit and heart. No matter what low points or high grounds of life I find myself in I will continue to write about what I believe in, passionate about and what effects this community. No matter what part of my life is visible to anyone or what anyone may say about me or too me, I will continue to convey my message because it is what I believe in.

So, I say to anyone that feel hurt, betrayed, low in their life depressed or just plain fed up. Don't stop the dream. Don't stop the movement and don't stop being you. If you're passionate about something don't allow anything to stand in your way to fulfill what you have in your heart. You will always have someone that will not agree with you, not like you, hurt you or even try to get others to see the worse of you but not matter what people say about you the most important thing is what you see in yourself. 

I am new to the little fame game, which means what little fame I have is detoured by negative opinions which is ok. Life is full of people that want to breakdown the person you are to make it hard for people to see what you want to convey. But, if you are like me and feel you have a calling to be part of something bigger than yourself,  that is all that matters. What is real in your heart will always be more powerful than any perception anyone may have. It is those who have heart that will see and understand what is true. 

Can people truly change

My friend Bryan just wrote an awesome post titled "Can someone truly change?"  I always read his blog and wanted to elaborate on another element of change that most of us may not be proud of but it is real. 

In the movie the "Matrix" Morpheus said, "Life is not without a sense of irony."  Yes life, if given the opportunity to live long enough, is filled with nothing but lesson enriched ironies. In fact irony cannot exist without change but there is a missing element to irony someone must "see" to fulfill the definition of the word "irony".  A person must have the perspective to see. Someone must be able to understand the world around them and in the inner-world within. 

Part of understanding is acceptance of what is real. Whether a person likes what they see or not is irrelevant to accept what is real is truth. Once that is accomplished then you determine if what you see is contradictory to what you want your life to be. In definition of what irony is "incongruity between what is expected to be and what actually is, or a situation or result showing such incongruity."  So you see, there must be mutation, transformation, evolution or whatever you want to call it.  Some form of change had to occur. 

For example, I never thought my life would be at the point it is right now. At age 20 I had my own house, working at a job I hated but steady, had a car, not much money in my pocket but knew I was destined for more if I kept working at what I wanted. Isn't it ironic that at this point in my life I obtained the very opposite of that I had, when learning through life means you are supposed to be richer than poorer. At least that is how I believe life worked in normal society.  

I always wanted to help people because I thought in life, being there for others is characteristic of good people. How ironic that with as many people I want to touch I feel somehow I have done the exact opposite the goal I wanted to reach. 

So, what does this have to do with change?  Something had to transform for this type of irony to take place. If I realize that my life is different from how I imagined it, then what changed? If helping people is what I always wanted to do but vision that I could have hurt someone, then what changed? Someone had to become different from the vision that I saw from myself or from the path of productive normalcy. 

Let's make this all simple. People can truly change and at times, not for the better but still a change. Someone must be able to see this or all they are doing is "living in a dream world". To know that life is not where you want it to be, to know that you may have hurt instead of helping others and to admit that whether you know it to be true or not is part of ironic perspective.  

Now, you must accept "what is real" at this point and whether you want to move forward to what you want for your life. The type of person you want to be, are you content with the accepting who you are right now, as is?

The question was can you truly change?  Yes, you can truly change and for the worse which for most people is the easiest change of all. It takes no effort to transform into what do not want to be. Now to transmute your being into the person you want to be, that is one of the most difficult tasks in the universe. You realize that you really did not know who you were if you could have easily moved to the opposite end of your life spectrum. In other words, you have to work twice as hard to truly know who you want to be and then to reach that goal. 

Friday, July 20, 2012

The gay nation's voice have been heard saying time to boycott Chick-fil-A

The gay community has been outraged with the Atlanta based company Chick-fil-A and its president, Dan Cathy. After several comments made in an article published by the Baptist Press opposing gay marriage on Monday, the outcry of dissatisfaction from the LGBT community has now turned into a battle-cry for war. The smell of a revolution is in the air and united gay voices are screaming boycott.

This year has given way to a tremendous change of heart towards the gay community with same-sex marriage piloting the transformation. So many people from different corners of the nation have supported the gay movement from the President in the White House to actors in Hollywood. Atlanta, containing the third largest population of gay residents in the nation, is still in disbelief that Dan Cathy did not share in the country’s support for gay rights since his company has existed in the backyard of the city’s gay population.

 The question now is what should the LGBT community do next?  The talk of a boycott has more than just been mentioned as the Huffington Post, Gay Voices, sent a tweet that asked “Can we talk? How r u handling Chick-Fil-A being so openly anti-gay? Have u decided to boycott? Is taking ur business elsewhere the answer?”

The responses are overwhelming. Here are some of the answers received by the @huffpostgay on twitter.
@averagewerewolf: I’ve been boycotting Chick-Fil-A since I first found out about this mess a year ago.
@ScottMontroy: I haven't eaten at ChickFilA in years. I am glad the public is finally learning what many of us have known for years.
@OneWritersSoul: Our family is boycotting and the money is going to @HRC and to@BarackObama - of course, we're also adding extra funds to both
@ilovepop91: There's a Chick-Fil-A on my campus, which is LGBT-friendly. Planning a boycott here.
@justinplatt: I'm boycotting chicfila completely. What they are doing is preaching hate.
If the lack of funds from the gay community’s deep pockets weren't enough, there is also buzz about flash-bomb kissing protests being posted. Basically, masses of gay individuals are going to enter Chick-fil-A stores and kiss in front of patrons, God and all. Talk about a gutsy move.

Well whatever happens, you better believe the LGBT community is going to commit to an action and in true fashion with fabulous style, there will be consequences and repercussions.

Chick-fil-A CEO steps back after making comment opposing gay marriage in Atlanta

The media and LGBT community has been in an uproar after a comment made by Chick-fil-A president, Dan Cathy, about same-sex marriage. In an article written in the Los Angeles Times, recent interviews from other media agencies cited specific ideals straight from the mouth of Cathy himself.

"The College Park, Ga., chain has won both censure and praise for recent statements made by its president Dan Cathy in opposition to gay marriage. In an interview with Baptist Press, Cathy said the company was "guilty as charged" in supporting the "biblical definition of the family unit."
“We are a family-owned business, a family-led business, and we are married to our first wives,” said Cathy, the son of company founder S. Truett Cathy."        
After reading such bold and insightful perspectives from the president of chicken, one has a perception, observation and question from not only the gay viewpoint but from a financial standpoint as well. Dan Cathy, have you lost your mind? Chick-fil-A is based in College Park, GA. Does he not realize College Park, GA. is just a suburb of Atlanta which contains the third largest gay population in the nation? There are almost as many gay people in Atlanta as there are black people and he dares to make an anti-gay comment at all. If anything, for the sake of public opinion, he should have just lied or at least as gay people say “fake it till you make it.”
There is no doubt Dan Cathy has seen the error of his actions as the company made the statement on Thursday "going forward, our intent is to leave the policy debate over same-sex marriage to the government and political arena." Don Perry, spokesman for the company, wrote an email stating “not proactively being engaged in the dialogue” which means keeping their mouth shut. One of the few bright ideas Dan Cathy had this week.
One of the last statements made by the company this week also in the L.A. Times is "The Chick-fil-A culture and service tradition in our restaurants is to treat every person with honor, dignity and respect – regardless of their belief, race, creed, sexual orientation or gender,"  The only thing to address about that statement is that there is at least one black gay person that disagrees because of the treatment he received from the Chick-fil-A store at 1901 Peachtree Rd in Atlanta close to the CVS. But, you have to guess who.

Gay bashing is alive in Louisville as girl is attacked by anti-gay bigots

It is hard to believe that openly gay individuals have to cautious and fearful of being who they are in 2012 but after a brutal attack of a 17-year-old girl in Louisville KY two days ago by anti-gay bigots, a warning of caution needs to go out to all gay people in that area.

What cowards they must be to have four adults beat up a child, a young girl no less, to the point of having a plate inserted into her jaw. That is one of the many injuries afflicted onto this teenage as she was thrown on the ground and kicked from head to toe. Now she has teeth missing, jaw broken in several places and mouth wired. A painful experience no one deserves. 

The girl, whose name is being withheld from the media with good reason, was walking home from the store with two younger male friends that happen to be brothers. One of the brothers noticed a suspicious group of adults following them. He became frightened enough to call his mother, Andi Hornback, to tell her of the impending danger but before she could get their location the attack started. One of the young boys was given a concussion while trying to help his friend.

In an interview with the Huffington Post, Dwight Mitchell, public information officer with the local police gave a description of the assailants. There were four adults, two white males and one biracial male and one light-skinned female. During the attack the boys heard anti-gay slurs and comments come of the mouths of the attackers. For this reason, the Louisville Police is looking to the matter as a hate crime.

First, prayers go out to all that were hurt during this despicable and cowardly attack. Also, a thank you goes out to the young boy that got hurt trying to help our gay sister. We hope you get better soon.
This is where we need to come together as a gay community.

This makes three sisters, of the LGBT community, attacked in the last month. If everyone remembers, Kristene Chapa who is still recovering in the hospital in Texas and Mollie Olgin that lost her life after, both shot in the head; now this vicious attack makes a bloodshed trinity. But, through the genetics that makes us a gay community and family, we will come together to stand up for each other during these hurtful times. When one of us is hurt we are all diminished. 

If anyone know anything, saw anything or know who these hoodlums are, please contact the Louisville Police Department. Whoever these terrible animals are that attacked our sister in Louisville will not get away. Justice will be served.

Wednesday, July 18, 2012

Fuck You Boy Scouts of America

Look at this kid recreating Jesus Christ on the cross like he is going through a mock stigmata. When looking at something like this and after hearing that the Boy Scouts of America did not want to change their policy, the only thing I have to say is FUCK YOU. Which is one of  issues they have a problem with right now in their ranks.

Next to the Catholic Church no other organization has such a problem with pedophiles having sex with minors. That is probably one of the reasons they are keeping the boarders closed to openly gay members child and adult alike.

The BSA claims they don't want to have to explain homosexuality to any of the youth members and that type of discussion should happen at home. Well no duh!  You are right on that issue, discussion about sexuality should be done at home, but when you figure that troop leaders are nothing but mostly parents volunteering wanting to be part of their children's lives, home is anywhere you go within the organization.

The real problem has to with money or should I say religious money. The BSA has always had God's money in their back pocket, meaning the church. You better believe that a private organization like BSA can only keep going through the heavenly donations provided from various religious organizations though it is not publicly admitted.

In fact there whole offense deals in trying to appease public opinion but always keeping to their core prejudices. This secret two year examination of their policy that everyone is just hearing about is nothing but a lie just to make it look like they gave their best effort for true social change. In reality, they probably was scared they would piss off their holy-rollers that help bank roll the organization.

So, for all you people out there that want to join so bad, just don't ask and don't tell but even the military canceled that injustice out.

Monday, July 16, 2012

I am kind of mad at Frank Ocean

I got something to say about this Frank Ocean coming-out mess that has been in buzzing in the media for last week or so. When I first heard about a black male hip-hop artist coming out to represent  himself as gay, I was like cool finally some real courage in the mix.

I have to admit I had no idea who Frank Ocean was. really was not aware of his music but to be honest he is not reached super star status yet. I took the time to check out his music, words and verse. To tell you the truth, the brother is quite copacetic.

Now, a couple of weeks later after he followed the example of my baby and soon to be husband Anderson Cooper (now watch someone is going to take that seriously) I talked to some of my media contacts and found out there is a rumor going around that Frank Ocean may not be gay. Some people believe that he is playing gay just to sell songs and make some money.

OK, what kind of shit is that? Now I am not sitting up here writing a blog for everyone to see this man's business online because I don't know if the rumors are true or not, but it will be hell if it is. Personally, I hope it is not but you have to admit the time is almost as opportunistic and suspicious as Obama shifting his gears during an election year.

Being gay is profitable. Everybody wants a gay person in the mix because it creates rating, controversy or something that get people noticing what is going on. It makes me think of  Little Richard. When he had a band they were known as "The Upsets" because he style and music seem to upset everybody.

Well you better believe if this rumor is true that Frank Ocean or should I say "Fake" Ocean is going to upset every gay person in the joint. When we support one of our own we come out in full force. Our pockets are deep and we roll deeo. So, if Frank Ocean thought he gained something by coming out of the closet perpetrating being gay; God give it and gay people take it away.   I SAID WHAT I HAD TO SAY!

Saturday, July 14, 2012

Which one would you pick Anderson or Drew

So, I know we have touched on this subject briefly and I definitely thought my mind was made up but there are some parameters that have changed. We must revisit the question and start the analysis all over again. It was a tough decision between who I found more attractive, Anderson Cooper or Dr. Drew Pinsky.  

Now that Anderson has come out of the closet, I have to say that something is different. At first I thought Dr. Drew was more attractive than Anderson Cooper but now that I know there is a millimeter of a chance in hell that I can actually get to first base with Anderson, my outlook has changed. 

Come on, you have to go with your strengths or at least go with the easiest guy in the room. If all three of us were in a room together, at least I know Anderson would give me somewhat of a look and I would be licking all over him like butter beans on rice.  

Easier there sailor, I better get control of myself. I heard Dr. Drew's wife like to cut a bitch. I don't want her coming after me but she can't blame a guy for caulking at her man. Dr. Drew is fine as hell but I know I would not have a chance in hell. He is straight and besides, he is a therapist and doctor too. Dr. Drew probably would tell me no and then charge me the same money as the rock-stars he treat in his clinic. I don't have that type of change to be chopped off the block.. 

If I am going to be told no, it might as well be by an "A" list gay celebrity that that understands my pain. Like anyone would tell Anderson Cooper no. Look at the arms on this man. All you gay guys out there, is there any one of you that would kick Anderson Cooper or Dr. Drew out of the bed if you had half a chance to get with these two. Inquiring minds want to know. 

Why don't we do a little poll. Comment on this post to which one you would want to be with. Hell, I think this topic might be worth putting up a poll just for the fun of it, on the page, to see where this discussion goes. 

Thursday, July 12, 2012

Mark S King is the man

So I am truly tripping over Mark S, King and his latest contribution to the Huffington Post. So much so, I actually written a spotlight article to highlight the subject matter that Mark is conveying to the public. Oops.. Can I call him Mark?  It is not like we are on a first name basis or even met but still, I am a huge fan of his work.

If you know anything about "The King" he has a blog and website MyFabulousDisease.com in which he takes a lifetime of his pain and brings out a positive message to all the gay boys and girls out here in the real world. You don't have to be down and out living with HIV.There is life after infection and that is the message he really is putting out there.

But back to his article titled "The Most Important Gay Porn Film Ever Made" which is more of a very informative sexual history lesson of the gay male culture. Which by the way, do you want to take a stab at what that porn happens to be?  If you have not seen the poster below this paragraph it is "Dawson's 20 Load Weekend."

Mark S King you are the man to bring this subject into interesting perspective. Now I am not trying to judge because lord knows I have seen this particular porn many times and the sequels to Paul Morris's work but I never really saw the porn as a pivotal point in the bareback sexual revolution from the previous decade.

When you read the article and really think about us, meaning all us gay men 30 years of age and older, this movie did bring back a common sexual practice that really needed to be in check. When this movie came out the nation finally got a stranglehold on HIV infections and people were more able to cope with new medication and education of safer-sex practices. Simply put, the movie glorified bareback sex to a community that needed to have bounds during a time gay men weren't looking out for each other.We confused sexual freedom with sexual irresponsibility. With that statement made I want to stress that every gay male out there need to take responsibility for your own personal health. No one else should be more invested in your not becoming HIV positive than you. Wear a condom if you don't want it to happen.

Now, I am not going to sit up here and be a hypocrite as if I don't enjoy porn. I like watching porn, I enjoy Dawson's porn and I believe Treasure Island is the best but Mark King educated me on something when I read his article. Dawson did his first movie after he found out he was positive so this movie was spawned out of a "I am positive now so fuck it" attitude. This type of attitude most gay men have in this game of promiscuous sexual liberation.

Now, I am not knocking bareback sex but I will always promote safer-sex practice and I want to promote something Mark wrote, can I call him Mark. The gay male community doesn't really look out for each other when it come to our sexual behavior. Looking out for one another and not destroying the community health wise by carelessly spreading the disease is not heavily practiced. So he preaches the same message I always have about unity and community, so me and Mark, damn there I go again, are on the same page.

Tuesday, July 10, 2012

Where is this boy's mama at

If I ever had anything to say now would be the time. If you have not seen this video, please click the play button above this paragraph right now. When I saw this video the only thing I could of is "Where is your mama at?" 

The name of this little man is Albert and the name of the video he is starring in is called "Booty Pop".  I am going to be real. If I did not laugh as hard I did, I would be mad at this child's parents. I am a gay man which means my sexual mindset is supposed to be more advanced than most but there is nothing advanced about a 6 year old boy standing up and having two grown ass women's butt-cheeks on both sides of this boys face. Where they do this at?

The sad part about the whole thing is that most people in the black community will not find a thing wrong with this young black male strutting around with this shirt off and  half naked women in bikinis shaking their asses with him singing the chorus "I can make your booty pop...booty pop...booty pop." Where is his mama at? Why is she not snatching Albert's butt up by the shorts with a switch, in one hand, giving him a spanking saying "If you talk about booty popping one more time, I'll pop your booty right now?"

I can understand that, with all the wild stuff that you see on the net, you have to "one-up" the competition but damn, is this what we are reduced too. And why did it have to be a young black male in the video? There are just as many young white males that will sing the same thing for less money that is if the boy got paid for all the hits on You Tube.

The bottom line is, this stuff is crazy and it perpetuates the hyper-masculine sex stereotype of the black man. The last thing we need is more perceived sex and less mindful steps.  I SAID WHAT I HAD TO SAY      

Saturday, July 7, 2012

No gay agendas but gay conspiracy yes

For those of you that don't know who this handsome devil is, this is my good friend Alex Jones. Ok, I am lying. This is my wish friend Alex Jones. I wish him to be my good friend.

Alex Jones is one of the most brilliant men on the internet because either he has the worlds welfare in mind with his well investigated conspiracy theories or he knows how to grab our attention and make us send him money. Anyway you look at it, it is a win win for Alex.

I admit that I watch Alex Jones' show Infowars and try to decipher what could be intelligent probability from pure bullshit but most of the times I catch myself always asking for the "documents" he claims to have to back up his claims but after writing my article about the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services doing a study that might destroy the ban against gay men giving blood I started to think "Alex you may not be far off after all."  Hold on don't stop me I am on a roll here.

Now, I can understand why the government decided to discriminate against a whole group of Americans during a scary time. Most of the documented AIDS cases first investigated were among gay males and little was known about the disease. The only thing scientists were sure of is the transmission through blood. With testing methods now almost 100% accurate and all blood having to go through pass testing regulations in place by the government, why has this ban not been lifted?

It makes you think that the government knows more about this disease they are letting on. That is why private research companies in the United States and abroad have made more strides in the area of vaccines and cures than government research facilities ever have. Also, they made this decision without hesitation but with much prejudice. We now know everyone can get HIV. No human is immune to it or are we? Again, more theories have popped up about the government having a cure all along and gay men, especially black gay men, are being used as test subjects which is more than theory throughout this countries history. Look at the syphilis experiments in Tuskegee.

Well I don't know about you but if I am an gay expendable asset, I want the value of what I am worth in small bills.

Thursday, July 5, 2012

Publish America has my book past the editing phase, next stop design

So I have been contacted by my publisher, Publish America.  It seems that my book is past the text editing phase and is waiting on a designer to take on the task of designing my book. There is no doubt I am very excited with every month that passes knowing that my book will soon be in print. There are parts of me that want to thank everybody I possibly can before the book has a chance to be put on paper. 

There is something within me that believes my life will change when my book drops online and on bookshelves in stores but there will be somethings that will remain the same. I would love to revel in this thing called success but I still have to pay the devil his due. Work is not done. Besides, there are thoughts in the back of my mind that tell me there will be some issues along the way. 

Publish America has a huge reputation online as being scam artists and game players. Publish America is rumored not to be the traditional publishing company they advertise on their site. There are loads of articles that describe every type of complaint you can think of from contractual problems and not proofreading the book properly to not putting out a book at all sometimes. 

Publish America is huge in the publishing games as far as quantity of books published so you know that not every author can be totally catered too. There will be problems. Not to mention with as many complaints found on the net there are also accolades and commendations for service. So who do you believe? Well I choose to believe how they have treated me so far. So, for all of you out there wanting to publish with Publish America here is my truthful and accurate experience to date. 

I sent them my manuscript, they read over my work. They accepted my work. They sent my a contract. I read the contract thoroughly.I understood my signing bonus was only a $1 but since I had not money to self-publish and they are footing the bill to produce the book, I did not care if they gave me a huge advance. I am a brand new author with little fame. If I was Denzel Washington then I would be at Harper Collins wouldn't I? They sent me my $1 on time which is a good sign because if they could not send me $1 within the contractual time-frame then getting $30,000 would be a little difficult. In the contract it said they reserve the right to advertise to their discretion which means, if they want to sink $10,000 into marketing they will and if they don't they won't. I have been getting the word out on my own and every since I sent the contract back to them. They said it will usually take six to nine months to have a book produced which they accepted two books from me not just one. It has only been six months so far they have lived up to every contractual expectation they have set. And they have been courteous on the phone and in e-mail. When I have called them they actually have called me back. 

So that is my accurate, bias and truthful account of my experience so far with Publish America. Even with all the advice given on the net you have to chose what to believe.Ultimately the decision is yours. I know it will be difficult all the way around and still lots more work to do but I call myself blessed that they wanted to publish my work inexperienced as I was. So until they do me wrong, I give them a "A" in the grade book so far. 

Wednesday, July 4, 2012

I am blessed to be gay

For some reason all day yesterday and today that I have been thinking am blessed to be gay. I am sure lots of you may feel that being gay is a long ways away from what you really consider this gift to be. Being gay is more than what gender you have sex with and if that is your stance, then you have no fully embraced what gay is all about.

First, you don't have to be feminine to be in touch with the feelings that are inside of your spirit. It already takes a lot of courage and strength to admit that you are gay to yourself let alone anyone else. Being who you are can only be accomplished by tapping into your reservoir of emotions to understand that person inside and out.

In the mist of understanding yourself you finally realize that connecting to you means to connect to those close to you and the world around you. This is something that some lots of straight people will have a problem in doing. Not trying to make stereotypical statement but the gay community is the one labeled "alternative". Knowing how the world works is a blessing something that comes a lot easier with being alternative. Gay individuals are closer to nature and not bogged down with the bullshit of games of degradation, destruction and chaos, though our lives do come with a little melodrama every now and then.

You see, we are given the great reponsiblity to know that being what you are honestly is giving thanks to the creator of all no matter what that entity is for you. Now, I am not a religious person by any means but it would be selfish in way to think that all of our knowledge and understanding ends with what we know alone. I guess what I am saying that I am blessed to be apart of the particular cycle of life which could not be in this world if I was not created. It had to be because here I am. To see things in the perspective of never being is a waste of time because life wanted me here.

There will be enough time for others to wonder what life would be like without me here when I am in the grave. Until then I am blessed to be what I am in the natural order of things. I am blessed to be gay.

Monday, July 2, 2012

I have an interview with C.D. Kirven

Wow, when I heard that I have an interview with nationally recognized gay artist, poet, activist and beloved sister of the gay community C.D. Kirven, I just had to blog about it. For people that don't recognize her in this pic, the picture below should tell it all.

This multi-talented sister's artwork has been featured in such magazines as Curve and displayed at the Butch Voice Conference. C.D. Kirven is the creator of a black lesbian superhero comic book titled "The Tao Diaries" and she also perform as a drag king under the suave Jamie Fauxx all over the country to raise money for so many organizations that she supports. Kirven is also a leader in the organization "Get Equal" which has recently shown their community spirit by a holding fundraiser on www.indiegogo.com to gather money to pay a cash reward for any information leading to the capture of the animal that shot the young lesbian couple in Texas.

I mean this sister is truly on point. I have seen her work here and there for a little while now but she is a force in the gay community that cares. The articles that I write deal with true unification of all factions of the LGBT community. C.D.Kirven embody the concept that unity is a must. You cannot solve any problems without it.

This will be my second major interview with Examiner so wish me luck.Also check out the Illiterate Tripe to see more of her artwork and the poem she created for the candlelight vigil in TX for Mollie Olign, our young gay sister that lost her life in this tragic event.

And I don't call Mollie Olgin my sister because she was black. I call her my sister because she was gay.