Thursday, June 7, 2012

All well that ends hell

I apologize to everyone for not posting in a week or so and also let me apologize if this post turns out to be illiterate tripe. I just got out of the hospital and also lost a relationship that I should have let go along time go but that is how love is.

Let me say that I  neither care who's fault it is nor do I care who did what to whom.  I was past all that a long time ago as I was hoping to make a new start with my ex-boyfriend of now. With all the things that has happened to me within the last few days I just want to wish him well and leave the conversation about that situation at that.

You know there are a few things I want to reminisce on that really blows my mind. My friend Bryan tried to tall me better but I would not listen and I am not just talking about relationships, I am talking about life. I just wanted to have a life that means something, you know.  I never wanted to get caught up in so much drama or melodramatic mess. I just wanted my life to have some smooth edges to it but never wanted to cut anybody like a razor. I always saw myself in a relationship and life with someone that gives a damn about what happens to me and not wandering because I had no destination to go go.

There is a large part of me that wonders "What did I do to deserve what I recently endured?"  I have decided to take my time and make sure I get the events rights because the last week and a half feels like a blur, but the ending up in a hospital part went by in slow motion. I just wanted to blog and let everyone know I am ok, I think and now it looks like I am single again. It is not the scariest thing in the world but it is better than being the sucker or an all day lollipop.

1 comment:

  1. Greg, I am truly sorry that you had to go through this, I opened my mouth in warning, knowing full well that the only way to learn this type of lesson was by actually doing. You had to go through it, you had to feel it, and you had to face the consequences of your decision and actions on your own. A little forewarning was to give you heads up and make you sit up and think.

    But, like I knew from the moment you and I had that discussion 2 or 3 weeks ago, that my advice was going to turn the way it did. I wasn't trying to be cruel in what I was saying and I hope you understand that I was only looking out for your best interests. I have known you longer than any of the others that you are dealing with and I alone have remained your friend from the beginning till now.

    I never meant for you to have to go through the pain and everything else, which is why I spoke up, you are human and you had to go through it to understand it. So you see, being able to see something doesn't always end well, it doesn't ease the pain of the person you are trying to help. I only hope that in some small way I was able to lessen the hurt you have sustained and I hope you know that I am now and always will be your friend.